I'm in chemistry and I'm OK,
I sleep all night and I work all day.
I clean my flasks, I read my JACS,
I do reactions well.
Someday I'll be unlucky
And blow myself to Hell.

CHORUS:
He's in chemistry and he's OK
He sleeps all night and he works all day.
He cleans his flasks, he reads his JACS,
He does reactions well.
Someday we'll all be lucky
And watch him blown to Hell.

I'm in chemistry and I'm OK,
I prowl the library all day.
The articles that I could use
Are gone when they're in need.
If I were a bookbinder,
I'd have them all to read!

CHORUS:
He's in chemistry and he's OK,
He prowls the library all day.
the articles that he could use
Are gone when they're in need.
If he were a bookbinder,
He'd have to learn to read!

I'm in chemistry and I'm OK,
I sleep all night and I sleep all day.
I like my work, I like my profs,
I go to seminars.
When I do any research
I just wind up with tars.

CHORUS:
He's in chemistry and he's OK,
He sleeps all night and he sleeps all day.
He hates his work, he hates his profs,
He sleeps through seminars.
The Boss can take the research
And shove it up his arse.

I'm in chemistry and I'm OK,
I work all night and I work all day.
I rotovap, distill it off,
Do chromatography.
I think that by tomorrow
I'll have some THC.

CHORUS:
He's in chemistry and he's OK,
He works all night and he works all day.
He rotovaps, distills it off,
Does chromatography.
We think that by tomorrow
He'll have some LSD.

I'm in chemistry and I'm OK,
I work all night and I sleep all day.
I do my work, I teach a class,
I earn another buck.
There's one girl in my section
I'd surely like to fail.

CHORUS:
He's in chemistry and he's OK,
He works all night and he sleeps all day.
He does his work, he teaches class,
He earns another buck.
There's one girl in his section
He's never gonna fail.

I'm in chemistry and I'm OK,
I sleep all night and I work all day.
I used up all the ethanol,
I don't know where it went.
Now I can't work for six weeks,
The stockroom's closed for Lent

CHORUS:
He's in chemistry and he's OK,
He sleeps all night and he works all day.
He used up all the ethanol,
He don't know where it went.
Now he can't work for six weeks,
He's drying out in Trent.

I'm in chemistry and I'm OK,
I work all night and I sleep all day.
I make bad smells, I produce tar,
I spend the boss' grant.
I tell him I'll make progress,
And work so hard I'll pant.

CHORUS:
He's in chemistry and he's OK,
He works all night and he sleeps all day.
He makes bad smells, produces tar,
And spends the boss' grant.
He tells him he'll make progress
Although he really can't.

I'm in chemistry and I'm OK,
I sleep all night and I sleep all day.
I work with nasty chemicals,
They really make a stink.
I use the waste containers
And never use the sink.

CHORUS:
He's in chemistry and he's OK,
He sleeps all night and he sleeps all day.
He works with nasty chemicals
That really make a stink.
To clear a room is easy,
He pours them down the sink.

I'm in chemistry and I'm OK,
I phone all night and I phone all day.
I buy up stocks, invest in bonds,
And sell commodities.
And when the Market's slumping,
I live in poverty!

CHORUS:
He's in chemistry and he's OK,
He phones all night and he phones all day.
He buys up stocks, invests in bonds,
And sells commodities.
And when the Market's slumping,
He does his chemistry!